Me: I can't believe I'm playing this well while trying to re-derive Boltzmann's distribution...
Daniel: My roommate just lit the toilet on fire
Me: ?
Me: On purpose or on accident?
Me: And you're still playing chess?
Me: Shouldn't you evacuate?
Daniel: He poured lighter fluid in it so it would make a funny sound.
Daniel: (it didn't).
...
Daniel: He just tried gas. Fireball + charred seat = bad
Me: I can't tell if you're laughing or crying about this...